Case in point: search strings. Here are some of the search phrases that have brought new visitors to my site recently:
"What does it mean when you wake up in the morning and see moving things in the walls or ceiling that resemble leaves or worms?"
"What happens when you drink three beers and take one asprin?"
"Expensive fancy pendants ladybug bootie."
"Dorkhead? You lash me with your words."
"Wooo Wooo Wooo Wooo Woo. Too many sleepless nights."
"Science misconception on cartoon spongebobsquare panteroony."
"Dance selk bum."
"Can't stop shivering, sick, vomit, sleeping a lot."
"Dope smoking monkeys."
"I caught a softball with my ungloved hand. Ow ow ow."
And my very favourite:
"Gay selk suck movies."
Seriously, guys. I'm not making any of this up.
In other web-related news, I got a fan mail the other day. It was kind of nice to get. Some fellow wrote me the following message:
"Hi Jennifer - i don't know you but i love you! read your script on the cruiser culture & thought the world of it. talk 'bought a noble cause ... it's nice to see someone leading the charge on the bike front media, you go girl! you've got your teeth into something bigger than you know! or maybe you do! cheers from california! -kev"
That's sort of adorable, don't you think? I mean, I so prefer to get fan mail than hate mail. (Was that an obvious thing to say? I think maybe it was.)
My urban family hasn't failed me yet. Anyway, that's another story. My point is this: Look at me! I'm foolin' people into lovin' me all over town. SO THERE.
That's the good side of things. The bad side of things is the creepy side. For example, I currently have a mystery web-stalker who works at Aon Reed Stenhouse Inc.
I know nothing about this person other than the fact that they seem to check my site daily, and tend to spend a significant amount of time loitering, which doesn't make much sense to me, since most of the content is static. (Who are you, mystery visitor? Why are you so interested? Do I know you? Are we friends? If so, why don't you just email me?) I'm terribly curious.
Questions to ponder:
1. How can something resemble both leaves AND worms?
2. What DOES happen when you drink three beers and take one asprin?
3. Do you think the person who was searching for "gay selk suck movies" was searching for me or someone related to me, or that selk was just a typo?
This week is, as usual, all about softball. And MTV. More on that later.
The Perseids Meteor Shower will be happening tonight. If you're out and about and you think of it, look up. I might be looking up too. And make a wish, okay?
Love from the inter-ether,