So. Here we are. One week down. Eight months to go. I had only three classes this week, as my Thursday and Friday classes were cancelled for Rosh Hashanah. This seems odd somehow, but I’m running on a “just go with it” philosophy these days, so went with it I did.
Ha. ‘Went with it I did’ sounds Yoda-funny.
I had a dinner party on Thursday night. I think it went well. I can never tell for sure, but I’m pretty confident it was enjoyed. The food turned out surprisingly French-seeming, which I didn’t expect. I made two small chickens, roasted potatoes and green beans. And a pie. I baked a pie. It was too juicy, but it tasted pretty good. There were no leftovers. I wonder if this means I made the right amount or too little? It’s so hard to say. There was a little photo-album perusing, afterwards. I’d forgotten how embarrassing some of the photos in my albums are. Wish I’d remembered. Ick. Sigh.
I’m sort of into all these Holly Homemaker things lately. I want to host dinner parties, and bake peasant bread, and make jam, and pies, and stock, and all manner of other things. I want to wear an apron. At the same time, I’m feeling compelled to paint all the time. The paintings aren’t turning out because I have no special talent or skill with a paint brush, but I like zoning out on it. Painting – especially the sort of random, abstract painting I like to do – is a really relaxing way to waste a Sunday. Especially when the music is good and the light kind.
I’m trying hard to like UofT. It’s not that easy. Classes are what I expected. It’s the people I’m not sure about. My friend Lee, who’s well into his Eng. PHD, says all grad students are hideously annoying, but that they’ll settle down and I’ll find my niche soon enough. I’m not sure. The hideously annoying part seems accurate, though. I have met some nice people, certainly, but I’ve also met a lot of people who are braggy and full of themselves and socially awkward. And I’m tired of having the same small-talk-filled conversation over and over again. It’s only been a week! I hope classes will be the thing that help. They have to.
The other issue I’m having is an adjustment issue. Queen’s and UofT are SO different. I mean, Queen’s is certainly too in-your-face. It’s like a giant, bubbly sorority or frat. And in a lot of ways, Queen’s people can be really fake. They’re too chipper and rah-rah friendly. But over the years, I learned to find that comforting. The prevailing attitude at UofT seems to be a sort of disdainful boredom. No one seems excited about anything, you know? It’s as if being excited or positive or upbeat would be a sign of inferior character. Everyone is very sarcastic, very cool (not cool-cool, but chilly-cool). Some people are downright rude. I was buying some texts at the Toronto Women’s Bookstore last week and one of the staff members working the bag-check was so heinously bitchy to me I was actually struck dumb for a second. Basically, I asked if there wasn’t one main UofT bookstore where students could buy texts or if all texts were scattered at various city bookstores like the Women’s (which seemed like a valid question, I dunno). And anyway, this girl looks at me and says “Looks like, doesn’t it?” And I replied, “Well, I wasn’t sure. I’ve only just arrived.” And she said – and this is an exact quote – “Looks like you figured it out. Smaaaart.”
I don’t get these people. I really don’t. I mean, the Queen’s “We’re all brothers and sisters” thing can get pretty old, but it’s still a lot more pleasant than this seemingly wide-spread UofT bitterness.
It worries me.
But okay. Like I said, I’ve met some nice people. I am going to make an effort to sit by them in class and maybe we’ll bond and all will be well. I need to be open minded and positive. Otherwise I’ll just be doing exactly what I’m complaining about, right?
Anyway. There’s not much else to report. I’m doing the Terry Fox run on Sunday. If you haven’t yet given and are interested in throwing me some financial support, you can go here to do so: http://www.terryfoxrun.org/local/asp/r/e/46806.
I haven’t yet posted my final stories from ION. I’m way behind in that regard because I decided to delete a bunch of localization stuff from my computer and only succeeded in fucking up my Adobe (Creative Suite 3). I have to fix it before I can sort out my outstanding clips. I’m not that techy, though. Gotta get in the right frame of mind.
Speaking of frames of mind, I did a silly thing last week. I watched the Richard Linklater movies Before Sunrise and Before Sunset back to back on Sunday night. (Read: my life is ultimately sad.) They’ve been on my list for years, but having now seen them all I can say is THANK GOD I didn’t watch them sooner. As if I’m not already screwed up enough in terms of what I think life is supposed to be like. Had I watched Before Sunrise while I was still in high school (when it came out) I’m sure I’d be even worse. I already imagine that the best sort of life is all about walking around, sitting around, travelling around and talking (intensely). And it’s no good, man. No good at all. Richard Linklater is a big fat romantic liar and that’s a fact. It’s been a week and I’m still feeling like I want to run off to Vienna. Yeah right.
Speaking of movies, thank goodness TIFF is almost over. What a lot of hoopla. Go away, celebrities. You’re screwing up the city.
Speaking of things being almost over…
P.S. Happy Birthday, Craiger. I love you much.