It's January bloody 17th and I STILL haven't taken down the Christmas tree.
Every time I pass it, it mocks me. And as I live in a small apartment, with an open concept living room/dining room/kitchen, I pass it a lot. I'm in the room with it right now, sitting at my desk by the front windows, and I can see it out of the corner of my left eye. It's just standing there. Mocking me. For being lazy. For failing to acknowledge that the holidays are over. For being, at heart, what I am (a ragamuffin, a slob, a TV watcher, etc.)
It's mocking me because it's January 17th and It's been up since the first week of December. And despite being made of metal and plastic and whatever foul substance they use to simulate pine needles (which may be plastic too, I don't know)... despite that, it knows as well as I do that I have a tendency to let things go.
December is the darkest month, but January is the coldest. And December is propped up by the holidays, the early evenings hung with twinkle lights, the mornings swaddled in pancakes. January, by contrast, is all winter light and icicles. Snowy mornings and shoveling. It's a time when other people flock to the gym and the After-Xmas sales, buying for their new, resolutioner lives.
I see them huff past me on the sidewalk in their brand new workout wear, and I want to laugh. At the same time, I know they are more virtuous than I am. I'm sure they've taken down their Christmas trees.
January, quite frankly, is an idiot time to make resolutions. If humans were remotely smart, we'd make our resolutions in May, when the weather and the light might be cooperative. But we're not smart. We make our resolutions in December, and fight to keep them in January, when it's cold. When the calendar gives us only Valentine's day to look forward to. A "holiday" that doesn't even come with a respite from work.
On second thought, why shouldn't the Christmas tree stay up? Why shouldn't it twinkle it's way deep into the New Year? Why does it insist on looking so forlorn and out of place? Stupid Christmas tree. Though, I suppose if I lived in a box in the basement, I might not be accommodating either.
Tonight, Nathan and I are going to watch five straight hours of Lost. We're going binge on homemade Indian food, and curl up on the sofa in heavy sweaters. We're going to drink martinis and eat almond cookies for desert. And we might (we MIGHT) even light up the Christmas tree.
The damn thing's still up, you see. So why not?