Anyway, I bought the lint remover, got it home, and was promptly confounded by the user's manual, which I shall now reproduce for you (in part), along with my translations.
THE MANUAL READS: Don't mix-use new and old or different type of cells and can't use charging battery.
JEN READS: Use new, matching batteries only, and no rechargables (even if you're an environmentalist loser).
THE MANUAL READS: Prohibit to deal with clothes wearing in body with lint remover, or it will result to hurt body.
JEN READS: Take your clothes off before removing lint from them (them being the clothes). If you don't, the lint remover might become angry, in which case we (makers of the lint remover) are not responsible.
THE MANUAL READS: Using after testing in the non-showy part of clothes.
JEN READS: This thing may destroy your clothing. Test first in an inconspicuous area. That way, if the lint remover makes a giant hole in your clothing, at least the hole won't reveal anything important, like say, a nipple.
THE MANUAL READS: The method of fast-remove: Move the lint remover back and forth on the shakeout clothes. Take the frame in small range removing to and forth on the clothes.
JEN READS: Use a to and forth motion. TO AND FORTH!
THE MANUAL READS: The method for the clothes with protrude fal-lals: Avoid the fal-lals.
JEN READS: Um... don't use this on your Barbie Glitter Ball Gown, or you will be sorry.
Now, I have two questions for all you web heads:
1. I think this is funny. Is that maybe just a little bit racist?
2. What is a fal-lal?
You tell me.